Manners are etiquette. Timeless.
All generalized manners: Please, Thank You, You’re Welcome, Excuse Me, responding to people when spoken to, making eye contact etc. are respectful and worthy of attention to be taught. They are all beneficial. But I really want to focus on the value of Yes Sir, No Sir – Yes Ma’am, No Ma’am following any statement, direction given, or question asked.
In modern society, I have observed manners are becoming a lost art. Formally, during the 1200’s Sir was introduced into society and in the 1300’s Ma’am followed. This began as a form of respect towards men and an acknowledgement towards a lady in society over the age of eighteen. If you were of the age to vote or enlist into the military, you were and are dotted obligation to be referred to as Ma’am or Sir. In society, it’s displaying respect and greetings to Gentlemen and Ladies to whom withhold wisdom and knowledge. It’s polite, well spoken, and articulate.
As an adolescent, my parents educated my brother and I on many things, as parents normally do. One of the lessons I fought the hardest growing up, ended up being the very characteristic I’m most grateful for today. The instillment of Yes Ma’am, No Ma’am – Yes Sir, No Sir. I remember getting in trouble when I didn’t follow my parent’s or other people’s statements, directions, or questions with Yes Ma’am, No Ma’am – Yes Sir, No Sir. It definitely wasn’t the “cool thing” to say in front of friends.
It wasn’t until my early twenties, I started understanding the importance; people reacted differently, held themselves more upright, became more in tune within the conversation, and their demeanor became open and friendly towards me when I acknowledged them in such a manner. I would get “Oh Hun, you don’t have to refer to me as that.” Or “You don’t have to say that to me.” At first, I wasn’t sure how to respond; I was also taught not to talk back. But to me, it was something I had to do. It was my obligation as a respectful human. I finally got to the point where I realized I could politely tell them, “Yes, I do. This is me showing you respect.”
The more I mature the more it baffles me this isn’t cherished within society. It wasn’t natural for me, but it was learned. Why is this type of responsibility not encouraged more within society? Why is it not generalized? Do we as parents not obtain enough respect for ourselves to teach our children these attributes? Do we as a society not respect ourselves and others enough to hold everyone to this high ethic standard? As humans, parents, teachers, leaders, influencers and role models this should be our obligation.
As I’ve grown in motherhood myself, I obtained an entirely new appreciation of these highly respectful attributes. It’s still not a common occurrence when you hear these words. But I do believe it should be. As caregivers, it’s our responsibility to mindfully teach, instill, and refine attributes in our children. Developing them into the most respectful human beings possible. Lessons radiate throughout their entire life and eventually impact those around them in a positive way, and even within our home.
Beckham is four and has started learning to use Ma’am and Sir correctly, when prompted. It’s incredibly endearing as a mother to see this quality within your child, or for me it is. Fruition within a child is a beautiful experience, especially when it involves qualities that’ll stay with them a lifetime.
With high morals and respectful nurturing, as mothers, we are responsible for the establishment, at the youngest age, what will be attracted to your little’s entirety life. They will naturally surround themselves around others with similar core values throughout their life and you’ll be able to trust your child is treating everyone respectfully when you’re not in their presence. Which, in return, leaves a mother’s heart at ease knowing they are safe and secure in a world that’s the complete opposite.
How incredibly humbling, as a mother, you hold that amount of influential power. God knew what He was doing when He placed that precious little in your life. My hope for us, as modern day caregivers is to start becoming more mindful everyday with given opportunities to instill these valuable life lessons. We aren’t going to be perfect but we can all make a conscious effort daily to be the best we know how to be and that’ll ripple throughout their lives in the ways they need.
Proverbs 22:6
“Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
